Pray to You

Pain of an impending train wreck
I was spared, thanks to a rain check
Before the waves came on deck
I ran to You to pay my respects
Stripped my ego down
Knees on the ground
I prayed to You, God I prayed to you

That lifestyle wasn't cheap, sacrifices so deep
I threw away my glory days…as I limped into the rat race
Knee-deep in my own craze, I tried to work through it always,
Basked in the fickle praise,
Felt lit for days, a toast and a raise.

Keep drinking that Alizé

"Simon does what Simon says"
But what goes up...it was only a phase
Stripped my ego down
Knees on the ground
I prayed to You, God I prayed to you

As my stories got too long
The audience said so long
where did I even belong?
I was isolated and alone
with not a friend on my phone
The feelings they were so heavy
My stories they were so messy
Those years are my darkest memory
That weigh me down
Knees on the ground
I prayed to you, God I prayed to you

It was a masked up life, what cliches
selling love with discounted bouquets
but the truth comes out after the haze
that all the decked out displays
were just a bandaid for our malaise

from conflict comes growth, always
Stripped our ego down
Knees on the ground
We pray to You, God we pray to you

Tripping in my Blahniks

The ceo in the grand sky
Took pity after my last high
Seizing and shaking
Finally forsaken
24 yrs old and barely awaken
Blacked out come to,
not sure of what I’d taken
Death wish to end this
The suffering is endless

Drinking for 2 years straight
Ready to call checkmate
must have sealed this fate

Drunk on gin & tonic
Tripping in my Blahniks
Acting histrionic
thinking I was iconic
Life is ironic and
the Universe is cosmic

Drank my way to unemployed
Future fucked and life destroyed
Using blow to fill that God-sized void

Plagued by my self doubt
Wondered how it would play out
An inevitable tragedy
Death was the reality
And then I found Recovery
God had a plan for me

Finding a higher love,
Shifting priorities
Changing loyalties
The truth became clear
Live in the possibilities

Working in a new tax bracket
They got me paying thirty-seven
When I was just a drug addict
Smoking dope in a deep depression
Racked up felonies for possession
Blind to my past transgressions
No remorse, no concessions

But i paid the price and it wasn't cheap
Deep-seated insecurities robbed me of sleep
no peace of mind for the sick and suffering
so many years later my hearts still recovering

Dot Your Is, Cross Your Ts

I only wear pants with the tightest crease.
Ones to match my monogrammed fleece.
Im not one to people please.
'Cuz I've paid my dues and my gangster fees. 

Now I just live and the world agrees.
It's like I'm the oxygen to their fatal wheeze.
It's a secret garden and I've got the magic keys.

I ride in cars that you can't even lease.
I bought all your land that the govt. seized.
Still livin' luxe as your assets freeze.

Not a fighter. Not a lover. Just an A-class tease.
'Cuz I already know the hurt that loving leaves.
And I've seen the scars that fighting frees.
Never let go of your priorities,
Always dot ur Is, and cross your Ts.

Danke Shoen

Forgive me for my weaknesses
I don't usually talk of this
Head in clouds oblivious
Ignorance is it really bliss
What u don't know could be dangerous

Coca cola and the coca-ccaine

It's how I numb all my emotional pain
A lifetime of vice, just to die in vain
I'm a few screws loose from goin' insane
But you love me still, baby, danke shoen

Nothing glamorous about my style
High as a kite, in a cloud of denial
Searching for light, been waiting a while

Tired of this fight, & God putting me on trial

My love for crime it left me this
Hopeless soul and penniless
Wasn't my goal but it's kismet
Broke to whole, I'm better for it

Counter-Culture

what luxury, the umbrella of youth,
it was ripped right off of me
what tragedy, exposed to the truth,
forced to see a harsh reality.

So while you were playing, making jokes with your school friends
Blowing out candles, dreaming of the weekend
I was working thru the long nights,
just tryna make a few cents
Barely keeping on the lights,
struggling just to make rent.

It was cold in those city streets,
imagine plastic bags were my bed sheets
The shame kept me on my feet,
rookie or royal, no man can sit with defeat

Hunger was our baseline, no safety net or lifeline
got me taking risks all the time, grew fearless by the finish-line.

No, not a damn bit of it made sense,
I felt robbed of my innocence
Still, ride or die in the dissonance,
cuz nothing is forever, and nothing marks the end
except for when the fat lady sings or when you're riding top-down in a 5Cbenz.

unconventional defines me,
counter-cultures what revived me,
monumental decade of piss high potpourri
Method acting got the best of me
Not who I really aspired to be
But coming clean has set me free

From outcast to outkast

Yea I was lower class, the foreign kid
told I'd be nothin more than a misfit
Yea it was real isolatin type of bullshit 

The kind that leaves u feelin incompetent
Pain so real wishin it was counterfeit
But fuck I survived thru the hell of it

From broke ass to first class, 

now my yards got the greenest grass.
From getting called an outcast 

to missed calls from Outkast.

Damn straight, success at last. 

No you never could've pictured that.

From the foreign kid to fucking legit
Future this grand, you better believe it. 

Better Days

My heart got burned and my minds still dazed.
lessons waiting to be learned, cuz I've been too busy gettin blazed.
"This too shall pass," it's only a phase.
Like tupac, I'm just prayin for some better days.

We were perfect in so many fuckin ways.
but like a drug, we were love-crazed.
Spending nights locked in a trance state lovers gaze.
dreaming we'd be together till our heads were covered in greys.
Hoping our love would last forever like them Shakespearean plays.

But I woke up and found myself lost inside this fcked up maze.
Tried to call you hoping you'd save me from the haze.
But you left me burning, in the most tragic of ways.
I thought you loved me, but no it was only a phrase.
I thought you loved me, but no the feeling never stays.